Memorable Monday - How am I Going to Live Today?

"How am I going to live today in order to create the tomorrow I'm committed to?" - Anthony Robbins

Since I have just gotten married (I mean literally 2 days ago!) this seemed like a highly appropriate quote.  It's very easy to say that we're committed to certain ideals or to hear a motivational speech and temporarily feel committed to a new way of thinking, but commitment is not some magical thing that just appears out of nowhere.

Whether you're committed to being a good wife, a good mother, a good friend, a good sister, a good worker, a good church member, or a good member of your community, it all takes work and real effort.  I think we sometimes get caught up in thinking that if we just find the right situation or the right relationship that commitment will just naturally develop.  I don't think so.

I first realized I had to work at the tomorrow I'm committed to when I was a kid in school.  I have a brother who is a year younger than I am.  I've always been a good student and I've always felt pretty smart, but my brother always seemed to be just a little bit smarter and faster than me.  I knew if I was going to shine next to this guy I was going to have to make a real commitment to homework and to putting a ton of effort into my studying.  This was all the more frustrating because his intelligence and wit seemed to just come to him so naturally.

Then, when I was 16 I became a mother and once again I realized that it takes a ton of commitment to be a good mother.  There's so much more to it than just loving your child.  Of course I continue to this day to learn about being a good mom, and a not-so-perfect mom.  The point is, those lessons don't resonate with you unless you first commit to being a good mom.  

I knew that my actions would speak far more than any words I could ever say.  So, I started living the today that would lead to the life I was committed to.  As my daughter grew, I monitored the language I used, the songs I listened to, the clothes that I wore, and the people I chose to spend my free time with.

Then there's friendships...I've made my share of mistakes and have plenty of regrets when it comes to friendships lost.  Each of those losses has affected me and each close friendship I've ever had has taught me how to be a better friend.  I'm much more focused on developing and nurturing those friendships now than I ever have been in the past.  I think this is one of the areas I'll always continue to evaluate and make sure I'm staying true to my commitment.

Last, but certainly not least, is the life I'm going to live today in order to create the tomorrow I've so recently committed to.  I've always been afraid of sharing my life with another person who is my equal, my actual partner.  To tell you the truth, it still scares me.

I've made so many changes in my life to leave behind the things that make me unhappy and to be completely honest, I've walked away from relationships that I just didn't want to work through.  It was so much easier to just walk away.  After all, my true commitment was to my happiness. If I saw someone as an impediment to that goal, I removed them from my life.  So, you can imagine that committing my life to another is a HUGE step for me.

For the first time in my life I am in love with someone who is worth the commitment.  I have married my very best friend who is just as committed to making our marriage thrive as I am.  So, what is it I'm going to do today in order to create the tomorrow I'm committed to?

• I'm going to put the needs of my family above my own.
• I'm going to take my husband's thoughts & feelings into consideration when making decisions that affect our life together.
• I'm going to trust that my husband loves me as much as I love him and is as committed to our marriage as I am.
• I'm going to spend precious time with my family and make sure they know they're my priority.
• I'm going to appreciate the things my husband does to show me that he loves and me and that he cares about his contribution to our family.
• I'm going to treat my husband the way I want him to treat me, with respect, love, and appreciation.

I know those of you who have been married for a while may be rolling your eyes right about now.  But, this is "How I'm  going to live today in order to create the tomorrow I'm committed to."